“Thus, one gains by losing, and loses by gaining.” Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching
One of the more perplexing concepts discussed in Curve, Jaylon is told by his mentor that there are times where in order to gain more interest you must be willing to lose that same interest. A more accurate way of looking at this is saying that the very energy we exert getting people to like us and gain interest is the same energy that keeps us captive to their favor and their opinions. The player is the one who is able to gain interest and remain resolute, not bothered or boosted by it because it in itself is not real. The energy of people liking you is not real. Your perception of that energy is. And the enemy of that same perception is to be aware of it. This concept of control that we have as humans is the very thing that negatively affects the quality of our life. The more we clutch to it, the more we cause ourselves and others harm.
One of my mentors told me something years back that I relish to this day and helped me in writing Curve. I was frustrated by the lack of options I had in my life as a young man of 22 and during our monthly rides around Atlanta, he laid some knowledge on me. He told me that at every point in my life there would be someone who would like me whether I was successful or not and that the best thing I should do was enjoy the station in life I was blessed with. He then went further reminding that I did not have a biological clock so to speak and that the sense of urgency I had was at most misguided. I learned then that the urgency to have and hold is the very thing that prevents us from receiving. A feeling is an energy given and I had to learn to be able to give even if it was only to myself before being able to receive.
For many people who are curved, being desired is their motivation for improving themselves and while it can be helpful, it can also trap them. The free nature of men and women of whom are the objects of desire stems from their freedom to not be bound by the opinions of other people. A common adage that a lot of males hear in their matriculation is to never elevate the sexual desire of the opposite sex also expressed as putting the pussy on a pedestal. What Jason is expressing to Jaylon in the novella is that by being unafraid of losing some women, he retains the very element that makes him desirable to more women and that is the freedom to express oneself without fear.
Wright World 